Posted by
Locutisprime on Thursday, September 24, 2009 2:39:14 PM
Environmentalists Seek to Wipe Out Plush Toilet Paper
Yes friends and neighbors, the looney left is now coming after your
individual a s s. Not satisfied with killing off American industry,
capitalism and your way of life, they are now coming after your own
dear little back side as their newest target of American indulgence.
They want your toilet paper. And they want your to use something that
has been created by one of their recycled visionary wizards of vegan
mother earth.
Stand by....there may be a rush for the commodity! The Stock exchange
may begin trading in Wiping futures soon. Hoarding will probably
follow, but in the end (pun intended) you may be forced to resort to
the corn cob twist like they did back in the old days.
And hey! With all those husks left over from bio fuel production? There
should certainly be enough cobs to go around. Now, all we have to do is
figure out how to flush them things and how to package them.